In a conversation with friends the other day, we revisited a theme we’ve been talking about for a few months. How we’ve each reached a point where it began feeling imperative that we step out of hiding and step fully into the truth of who we are. To tell the truth about who we are and begin to share our gifts more widely and openly. The journey has been different for each of us, and yet there are similarities.
I’m passionate about my work. I love it and I’m good at it. But for too long I’ve kept myself tied with old stories. My shyness kept me from actively marketing my gifts. The “oddness” and “woo-woo” factor of being an intuitive and Akashic Record reader often left me wishing I were cut from bolder fabric. It’s amazing how good I’ve gotten at standing in my own way!
When it comes to the business end of things, it’s always interesting to me to hear what’s difficult for each of us, and I’m always somewhat surprised when it’s different stuff than mine. But for most of us, no matter what it is, there comes a point when a predictable pattern sets in. For anything to happen, some sort of action has to be taken. And of course working intentionally is so much easier, so that’s a good thing to have in the equation. Set the intention, and then take action. Sometimes just having one foot outside your usual comfort zone can feel like a gravity-defying huge leap, even if everyone else just rolls their eyes and wonders what the big deal is.
But I’ve come to expect that any action that feels big to me, no matter how it might be perceived by outside eyes, is inevitably followed by a feeling of ooh-scary-what did I just do?!
It’s taken me a while to understand and be okay with that without jumping into panic and then firmly gluing my shoes back into stuck position. I think the other natural tendency is to want to obliterate that feeling. Power over it. Ignore it. Shout it down.
I don’t think either of those responses is wise or helpful. I think we need to honor that part of our self that’s scared. It doesn’t know how things will work out. It can’t possibly know. And it’s just trying to protect us. I think we need to be gentle with it. Acknowledge it. Say thank you, I know you’re trying to help; and send it love. But don’t give in to it. Don’t let it stop you from taking action. And keep moving forward until you reach a point where you can almost smile when you hear that voice, and think kindly, ah, that’s my scared-self voice doing its thing. And forge on ahead.
Wow! Are you inside my head?
I’m sort of at the starting point, exploring things in the more “woo-woo” sphere, working on my blog, etc. And there’s this *terror* of outing myself to my more techie/designer friends and colleagues. The fear and shame is big there. I know I can’t push it down or obliterate it… but man I wish it wasn’t so! *grin* Sitting with that, this is comforting, thank you! ~E.
Hi Eileen – thanks for stopping by! I do think it’s helpful to know that we’re not alone with these feelings. And I’m guessing that where you are and what interests you will be less of a surprise to your friends that you imagine. And even if not, it truly is a wonderful empowering thing to be able to claim fully who we are. Know I’m out here cheering you on!
Deborah – this post is like a cooling balm on a bad sunburn. Thank you. I feel “taken care of” by you and this post.
What an amazing thing to get from a blog…on the *big, bad, Internet*, eh?
*grin*
Thanks for the kind words Suzanne, and I love the imagery! It got me thinking that taking care of our scared self is the ultimate in first aid isn’t it?
You bet it is! I’m so grateful I’ve learned that. And grateful to know you!