is for Cherry Picking
Cherry picking is defined as selectively choosing the best, most desirable, most beneficial items from what is available.
While I’ve often heard the term used as a mild pejorative, I’ve really been embracing this of late as the most wonderful example of exquisite self-care.
I owe thanks to a friend who pointed this out to me – that I was cherry picking – because I hadn’t quite thought of it in those terms before. But once she mentioned it, I’ve picked up the basket and run with it.
We’re all looking for balance. I know that’s true. All of us have countless things on our plate; people we need to interact with, tasks that need to be done, emails to be answered – what vies for our attention seems endless and continually growing. Even those of us who lead rather simple lives, and I include myself in that category, can fall prey to overwhelm, excess, and a continual sense that there isn’t enough of us to go around nor the time to make it happen.
Emilie Wapnick of Puttylike has done wonders to bring focus to the idea of multipotentialites, which she defines as “a person who has many different interests and creative pursuits in life… We have many paths and we pursue all of them, either sequentially or simultaneously (or both).”
I definitely consider myself a multipotentialite and it’s when I’m pursing lots of things – actively following what inspires me – that I’m most happy, most creative, and most being who I truly am.
I used to rue that. I wished I had the single-sighted focus of other folks; a more linear way of operating that had beginnings and middle points and endings lined up in a predictable fashion. I can laugh at that now, and what I really rue is that I spent any time whatsoever trying to bend myself into being something that I’m not.
I love that I feel good about who I am and that I don’t want to be anyone else – just me full out.
And so it feels perfect that I not only like cherry picking but that I advocate everyone do it. Choose what feels right for you; what supports you; what sparks your curiosity and drives you into delighted exploration; what fills you; what makes sense to you. Pick those things. And leave all the rest.
No system is one-size-fits all and those that insist most strenuously that they are, are really asking that you bend yourself and ignore the parts that don’t fit, perhaps even disowning them in yourself. What if instead we all chose to walk our own right-fit path – cherry-picking amongst everything what was perfect for us?
What if we let go of the judgments and the pejoratives that suggest it’s self-centered or perhaps even avoiding the hard stuff when we cherry pick?
Let’s just celebrate ourselves and each other, marveling in our exquisite self-care knowing that we’re choosing the perfect cherries to fill the bowls that are our lives.
All this speaking of cherries made me think of a little stash of cherry beads I have. For a while I had them strung as part of necklace, but I desconstructed that and am now awaiting inspiration for their next incarnation. But they do delight me so, so I thought I’d give you a peek. Along with one of my cherry bowls. They make me smile each time I use them.
Now tell me about you. Is there some place in your life where you should be doing some cherry picking? Are you practicing exquisite self-care? Filling your bowls with good things? Do tell – you know I love to hear.
Oh Deborah. You’ve spoken from my heart as well as your own. I used to struggle so much with trying to be focused, not just with my activities and interests (well, obsessions, really) but with my whole identity. I was just writing about this on my blog, and then I hope over here and I find a whole bowl of cherries picked just for me. Thank you. ♥
Now it’s time for fruit salad.
Oops. I meant to say “hop over here,” but wrote “hope” instead. I think I like it that way. 😉
Me too. 🙂
How perfect Harmony. And thumbs up to your post – I headed right over and read it. Here’s to bowls of cherries (and fruit salad) for us all!
Your post spoke to me loud and clear! Yes, I have been burning the candle at both ends so to speak because I have so many things I want and need to get done. So many interests, so little time.
I had not heard of the term ‘multi potentialities’ before but I LIKE IT!
One thing my business coach has me working on is focusing on the things that make me feel good because I was filling my to do lists with so many things because I thought I ‘should’ so I see how this coincides with cherry picking. “cherry-picking amongst everything what was perfect for us” LOVE IT….
I REALLY enjoyed reading this post! Thank you for a different perspective and a great reminder.
Sounds like great (and fun!) advise from your biz coach. Wishing you lots of ease as you navigate this.
At first I thought you were talking about cherry picking literally. I thought, ‘Is it the season for cherries already? And isn’t Deborah in the US, so it’s definitely not cherry season where she is?” By the way, I’m a multipotentialite, too, and it’s only been in the last few years that I’ve realised there’s nothing wrong with me and learned to appreciate it.
LOL – nope no real cherries were picked in the production of this post.
The tribe of multipotentialites is big and it’s fun to be part of it isn’t it?
Oh Deborah, I love cherries. So cherry picking has come natural to me. 🙂 It’s very close to my heart. I am one that loves to do a lot of things. Which in the past has created an influx with some thinking I’m always searching but never finding peace. Although, for me, it’s proven, by not being a bit selfish every now and again, you will only end up like Raggedy Ann. A bit boneless with no structure for living a joyous life. Thank you for the wonderful article.
Love the Raggedy Ann analogy Kelli. And I so delight that you understand taking care of yourself is paramount to a joyous you. Keep picking those cherries!
I’m so pleased that I was able to introduce you to the wonderful world of multipotentiality. I just knew that you would be a perfect fit for that community.
I also associate the term cherry-picking with certain sports like soccer and hockey – it refers to the practice of a player hanging out near the opponent’s net rather than playing defence, so as to “cherry pick” the best/easiest shots.
I think the idea of only choosing what lights us up is a great one. Cherry pickers unite!
You so have my gratitude for the intro to multipotentiality Sarah!
I’ve been curious about the different definitions of cherry picking. In sports it means something easy, and yet when I think of the apparatus called a cherry picker that is basically an industrial basket on an extending arm that lifts people really high in the air, I think how challenging that is. It makes me nervous just looking at people up in them.
To the extent that I have been cherry-picking, it’s been applying for jobs. When you’re unemployed, you both have to avoid being too picky, and avoid not being picky enough. Applying at jobs you know you aren’t interested in, or at companies you know have soul-crushing policies leads to the strong possibility of being offered one of those positions. On the other hand, government programs require you to prove you’ve applied at X places a week, and too often the bad-fit jobs are the ones that are open. (Because no one wants to do them.)
Cherry-picking job applications has gotten easier since I built up a skillset and experience, thankfully.
That’s perfect.
“I feel good about who I am and that I don’t want to be anyone else” This sums up my central theme lately. It feels so good to step fully into “me” without apology or shame. Keep shining brightly Deborah! 🙂
I celebrate your shining as well Amy!